Raising Competent Children: A New Way of Developing Relationships With Children

As a primary(elementary) school teacher for over 20 years I have been waiting for a book which encapsulates my experience & philosophy - this is it!!!! Jesper's advice is to use co-operation rather than coercion as a means to get your child to work with you & not "against" you. This book encourages us to respect our children and use that as a means to have them respect us back. While not a recipe for having children dictate to us, it teaches them to be independent and therefore instilling in them the qualities we would like them to demonstrate by our modelling it to them. Using it has made me really enjoy my interactions with my 4 year old!!!

Such a thought provoking book! Truly transformational ideas for how to live and treat each other (including our children) with the dignity we all deserve.

And very interesting that the same messages on a philosophical level is similar to other thinkers such as Michael brown and on some level I am also hearing Kierkegard in the background.

Really interesting and actually his tips works really!

Very helpfull - I would like to recomend this book to all new and old parents.

love it

I am a huge fan of jesper juul... Just worthwhile knowing however that this book is the same as Your Competent Child....

Great book!

Top takeaways from reading the book:- Pages 30 - 33: Children copy their parents. Examples: A child, who is cared for, cares about others. A child, who is criticized, criticizes others or himself/herself. Children, who are brought up in non-expressive families, become either silent or talkative.- Page 52: Instead of blaming children, adults need to accept responsibility for mistakes adults make themselves.- Page 96: Because children continuously challenge beliefs, boundaries, values and emotions of people, they naturally help everyone around them to learn / grow.- Page 107: A child is responsible herself / himself for what she or he senses. For example, a child is responsible for what she or he thinks tastes / smells / sounds / looks good or bad.- Page 107: A child is responsible for emotions, which he or she feels.- Page 118: When a mother and/or a father has / have an important issue to discuss with her / his / their child, she / he / they need to agree on a time and place to have a conversation with the child about that issue.- Page 172: The more parents criticize children, the more children feel they are wrong. The more children feel they are wrong, the more difficult it will be for children to do something right.- Page 213: To be as valuable to children as parents want to be, listen to children, recognize them as competent and learn from them.

Me ha encantado eso libro. Ayuda mucho a entender tu propia infancia y asi ayudarte a ser mejor padre/madre. Muy recomendado para padres primerizos.. y no primerizos tambien:)

Habe einen Stern Abzug gegeben, weil die Übersetzung ins Englische nicht gut gelungen ist. Finde Jesper Juuls Bücher gut und wollte sie meinem amerikanischen Mann näher bringen. Hab angefangen zu lesen und fand den Stil richtig holprig.