Beauty Queen

There are almost 70 reviews that precede mine, so the reader already knows what this story is about! What drew me to this book is the unusual task that the author, Linda Glovach, stated on the back jacket of this book that she undertook to author this novel: "Writing the book, I saw my old dope dealer and bought $1,500 worth of pure heroin-Brown Gold-and started shooting up ten times a day to get the feel of the book. Well, I did, all right.  I Want My Life Back  I ended up in Glen Cove General, almost dead. In truth, you make a deal with the devil. He takes away your pain, but he owns you. You live for the next fix. After awhile, it's totally physical, your body has to have it. But I'm off it for good." How many authors would do this to prepare themselves to write?Personally, this story touched so many topics that I finished the last pages with a multitude of thoughts on various subjects. I noticed how Glovach set up the protagonist, a 19 year old woman named Sam, as a prime target for an eventually fatal heroin binge with initial and constant references of low self esteem and self put downs.  Low Self-Esteem Misunderstood & Misdiagnosed  Glovach has Sam assert: "But who would love me, right? I don't even have the brains for college. Even worse, "I feel awkward and gawky. I wear a banana-boat size shoe (an enormous 11) and they used to call me the "Jolly Green String Bean" in high school. What's worse, I feel depressed and nervous most of the time. A mess, right?"Sam also is a child of a broken family (her father was a professional hockey player that deserted the family when she was young) and her mother is a full blown alcoholic that is irresponsible, sloppy and neurotic.  From Mexico with death  With Sam being so depressed, self conscious, and anxious, the reader wonders how she will be able to bare herself when she is introduced to the sordid world of adult night clubs and strippers. With the promise of fast money and financial independence from her dysfunctional mother, Sam gets a job as a dancer in a strip club.  Strip City: A Stripper's Farewell Journey Across America  Glovach writes about the usual regular that frequents a strip club: "Most of them have bad marriages, pressure at work or home, are lonely, or just want to have fun". How will a girl so self conscious be able to bare herself in front of strangers? Introduced to heroin by a fellow dancer, all of her shyness is solved, albeit temporarily.Initially, Sam describes heroin as the "perfect comfort drug". Her fears are gone, and she paints a euphoric picture. Glovach writes about Sam: "It's so simple. I just do a shot and, in a few minutes, my pain and fear go away and I feel incredibly beautiful, like a real movie star.  G-Strings and Sympathy: Strip Club Regulars and Male Desire  From the whole inside of my being I felt tranquil, like maybe I touched or found God-or he let me know everything was and always had been O.K. I was happy at last. In fact, I wasn't ashamed to be a topless dancer". The story continues to talk about Sam's descent into an ever increasing habit of heroin abuse. However, while Glovach goes on about how wonderful the "Fugi Powder" or "Magic Potion" makes Sam feel, there is very little mention of the negative consequences of heroin addiction.  Chasing the Dragon: One Woman's Struggle Against the Darkness of Hong Kong's Drug Dens  Absent are known aftermaths of heroin addiction such as abscesses, aids and sexually transmitted diseases from risky behavior, negative legal consequences, or the ultimate and final fall of anyone on drugs:jails, institutions and death.The novel chronicles how Sam meets a suspended cop, Blaine, who is accused of raping a woman who called 911 for being raped herself. All of Sam's friends warn her to stay away from this man. Giving her a wedding ring and a plane ticket to San Diego, Blaine promises a a trip to paradise. The story ends when Blaine doesn't show up the day of the flight and Sam takes a fatal overdose of heroin. She is found dead on the floor by her best friend, with the journal that this novel is composed of on the kitchen table.  Confessions of a Womanizer  Obviously, Glovach wanted to show that this is a bad road to go down, that one has to learn how to ask for help when in trouble, and that taking drugs to dull pain is never the answer. While the story was flowing and ultimately the lesson of "drugs kill" is communicated to the reader, I felt that the euphoric effects of heroin were over-touted and the negative and horrible side of the disease of addiction scarcely received it's due attention. Regardless, a very worthwhile read!

Written as a young girl's diary, the book immediately immerses you as Samantha's best friend, the one she will tell everything to. I found myself liking Sam right away, I imaged her as having an innocence, or gullibility to her that was sweet but not annoying; and right away we see that her feelings run deep beneath the surface of her pretty face.Sam starts her diary immediately following her break up with her boyfriend, who she cared deeply for and who abruptly informed her that he was seeing a woman 15 years his senior. He broke her heart, and so at her psychiatrist's suggestion, she begins to write down her feelings for us. In light of being her only confidant, right away we discover that her mother is a well-off alcoholic, a former model falling into her decline, with a handsome boyfriend who would like nothing more than to get to know Sam a little better while her mother is passed out. Right away we glimpse Kevin Reed's intentions as Sam returns home to find him in her bedroom watching porn flicks and asking her to join him.Sam knows she needs a change in her life, but her low self esteem tells her she is not smart enough for college, that no one could possibly love her, and that she will never be able to even take acting classes to become the actress she dreams of being. She and her best friend Nicole do find a nice place and move in, taking Sam's diabetic cat with her. Then Sam decides to take a job in a topless club, leaving behind her low paying fast food job. She is very nervous at first, and a fellow dancer turns her onto the "relaxing" effects of heroin, telling her that her modesty and uneasiness will dissolve, making the job more tolerable. Which it does.And so begins Sam's decline. Still heart-broken over her ex-boyfriend, she meets a man named Angelo who has ties to the mafia but treats her with respect and affection. She also meets Blaine, a handsome and reckless cop who frequents the strip club. I found these two relationships of particular interest in reading Ms. Glovach's story, because Sam is at heart an innocent girl, she readily trusts the cop and not the mafia thug; and the good/bad roles here are reversed, only magnifying Sam's naiveté when judging character. Her desire to be loved is heart wrenching, and manifests in all the love that she pours out to others who become close to her. In the case of her ailing cat, the love is justified. But in the case of Blaine, this love is used against her in a thoughtless and heartless manner by a man who is seeking only his own gratification for his own sick uses.Finding a release from her pain, boredom, dejection, and feelings of inadequacy with the heroin, her usage increases at an alarming rate while we listen in helpless silence to her denial of addiction. Eventually, she is unable to even finish a diary entry without shooting up, and yet still she offhandedly dismisses her habit as recreation rather than real addiction.This sad tale of a beautiful girl becomes all the more depressing when you realize that it has truly poured from the heart of Anygirl in Anywhere. Our daughters, our sisters, our nieces, our friends; they all manifest feelings of inadequacy somewhere in their life, and this story could be theirs. On a quick note, the author, Linda Glovach, tells of purchasing and using heroin in order to "get the feel of the book", and found herself addicted and almost dead in a hospital. Her amazingly articulate vocalization of her experience should be noted. Of her own experience with heroin addiction, she said, "In truth, you make a deal with the Devil. He takes away your pain, but he owns you. You live for the next fix."Poetic and real. Don't be fooled into believing that this is a book only for teens, do yourself a favor, especially if you have a daughter, and pick this up. It's a quick, poignant, unforgettable read. Enjoy!

"Beauty Queen" is not particularly impressive, even by the standards of a teen anti-drug novel. The protaganist, Sam, is archtypal - a teenaged girl with low self-esteem, from a broken home with an alchoholic mother. Her therapist advises her to move out, and she winds up stripping and being introduced to drugs.While I know that sometimes things do happen this way, the entire plot came across as incredibly contrived. The way she gets into heroin in the first place; the mobster with a big heart looking out for her; the loser, drug-dealing cop lover. She even has a diabetic cat, and is therefore already familiar with needles. Without revealing too much, one can see where everything is going and the part everyone plays in it almost from the start. It is less a self-destructive roller coaster ride than a plunge straight to hell from the very minute she moves out of her Mom's house: Sam literally cannot go even a journal entry without shooting some smack from the very day she starts using.If you are looking for anti-drug "smack fiction," then go with "Smack." The novel is much more sophisticated in terms of its character development and its plot, and furthermore one can learn a lot about 1980s British punk while reading it.

I had been waiting for a while to purchase this book. It was on my personal wishlist for a while and I just never got around to buying it. When i did, i was so excited to finally read it. Boy, was i disappointed. It was like reading a book written for a middle school student. It was obvious what was going to happen in the end and it just wasn't well written. This had so much potential, but it just fell short. There are so many books of this subject matter that are hauntingly good. and this one...just isn't.

Good book